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COMPANIONS
Patience Mandatory	Wendy Schmitz
March 2010 COMPANIONS By Wendy Schmitz Patience Mandatory I have been home with my new baby for two weeks. This means two weeks of dog to baby interactions. My four dogs and the new baby have been finding a balance for their new relationships. Loosely translated this means my baby has very wet hair from all the kisses and nose nudging. Thankfully the transition has been more or less painless, not perfect, because nothing with dogs ever is, but fairly carefree given all the things that could have gone wrong. The boys showed no animosity or aggression toward the baby but they certainly were not oblivious either. A couple of the dogs weren't that interested in the baby at all. The Rottie was hopeful that the baby would be his friend, now he just thinks the baby is boring. Harold interestingly enough had the worst reaction... a week straight of crying. Crying when the baby cries, when the baby sleeps, when he sees the baby, when he can't see the baby, non-stop, 24 hour a day crying. I didn't expect this, a transition period of assimilation sure, but not continuous whining. In week two the crying finally subsided but the experience reminded me that patience when living with dogs is mandatory. While it would have been easy to get upset with Harold and/or punish him for his anxiety, it wouldn't have helped him. Alternatively, to punish him might even have created a negative association with the baby, which would have definitely been a bad thing. So in my sleep deprived, baby haze I did the only thing a new mother could do, I ignored it. I just didn't have the energy to do anything else. I felt bad for leaving Harold in a lurch. I worried that his new life would be filled with chronic baby related anxiety but I really didn't have much of a choice given the circumstances. Lucky for me my patience by default not only worked, but was just what the trainer ordered. When dogs show stress or concern it is often best to just use patience and wait out the moment. Dogs often look to their owners to determine how they should respond to new stimuli. If you get upset when your dog gets upset it can make them feel validated in their concerns, while if you ignore their response or act as if everything is alright it can encourage them to reassess their reaction to determine if there is a more appropriate response. After a week of worry Harold finally took a cue from his canine brothers that there was nothing to worry about. He is now content and seems to have found peace. The ignore approach can work for many things in dogs. Ignoring anxiety and fear-related behaviors can often convince dogs that all is well and there is nothing to worry about. The key is patience on the part of the human. If the dog can see that there is nothing to be anxious about they will usually work through their own feelings and become a more stable member of the family. Sometimes this can take awhile; a week is a long time. But in the end I did very little and got the exact result I was hoping for, harmony in my house. So if your dog is faced with a new situation or is showing fear or anxiety that is not aggressive try just taking the high road and ignoring their response as long as it is safe to do so. Draw upon all your reserves of patience, maybe have a nice glass of wine but whatever you do don't punish or draw attention to the negative behavior and you might just luck out and win the battle without the war. Think like a dog tip #2: It isn't a cubicle you’re stuck working in; it is a den supplied by your loving master so you'll have a safe place to retreat to when you feel defeated and need to relax. :) Wendy Schmitz owns Life With Fido Canine Behavior Modification, Counseling & Training [937-470-7684, lifewithfido.com].
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